Fellow Kenyans, see how you are wondering where Magufuli is? That’s how wives feel when you go for Pombe on Friday and you don’t come back. Kabambe unazima. Sunday, Monday, Tuesday…
Bibi calls all your friends. She calls HR, your mum, shylock. On Thursday, she starts beating laps around morgues. Imagine bibi yako anatangatanga kwa morgues looking at goons shot by police! She even calls your ex from campus days. By Friday, her sexy, beautiful pot is gone because of stress.
Then on Sunday, you chomoka from your hideout in Ndenderu and stroll into the house like you just left thirty minutes ago! The kids are soooo happy to see you.
Madam looks at you those ones of…”If murder was legal…” But deep inside, she too is happy you are alive. Not because she loves you. It’s just that this country hates widows. That’s all.
But at the back of her mind she’s thinking, what does this idiot go to look for in Ndenderu that is not in this house?
Haka kaswali k husumbuwa wamama saaana!